Do you remember the first time you learned about “reverse psychology?” I’m guessing it might have been when you were a child, and you were trying to get your way and your parent, or some other authority, was standing in opposition. Or maybe that same person was trying to get you to behave in a particular way, contrary to what you wanted?
“Reverse psychology” is about proposing the exact opposite of what you want to happen to convince another, naturally inclined to be in opposition, and tricking them to respond exactly as you would like. Encouraging a child not to touch the healthy apples when they’re hungry for a snack. Convincing your parents that you’d rather stay home this Friday to hang out with them. What example do you think of or maybe have some experience with?
The focus text we’ve had throughout our August worship series on time has been from Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. These verses include 14 pairs of opposing forces. There is a time to… be born, die, plant, pluck, kill, heal, break, build, weep, laugh, mourn, dance, throw away, gather together, embrace, refrain, seek, lose, keep, discard, tear, sew, keep silent, speak up, love, hate, war, and peace.
I’ve been thinking this week about how often when we desire one side of these action pairs, we actually need to do the opposite. Some are obvious – we can’t pluck up before it’s first planted. Why go looking for something if it isn’t first lost?
Other pairs seem more nuanced and function more like the “reverse psychology” of our childhood games. How often do we crave to embrace the things or the people who only seem to push us away? How much more desirable are the situations that we can expect to also be bad for us? Have you ever laughed so hard that you cried? Or cried so hard that you eventually had to laugh about it too?
As we consider the waning days of our summertime, take stock of where we find ourselves on the spectrum of these pairs of “seasons” described in Ecclesiastes. And if you find yourself wanting more of one, perhaps you first need to do more of the other. If we want more love, perhaps we need to hate injustice and intolerance even more. If we want more peace, we need to go to war against oppression. If we want more life, let’s put to death the tools of destruction. If we want more, let’s focus on giving more away.
May God’s peace come to you this day. -Pastor Peter
Let us pray…
Gracious God, when we make war, bring us peace. When we are destroyed, build us up again. When we break down, restore our spirits. When we are emptied, fill us up again. When we push you away, come back to us again. Amen